32 years battle… LOSER

My mind play tricks on me
my heart it’s broken and my body is full of disease
how could I disagree
my hands are dirty, my conscious is filthy, my dreams are empty
LOL, you really think this is the end?
I don’t deserve suicide, I already tried
my penance is to stay alive
to keep pretending that one day I gonna regret
for all this bullshits that I make you read and it’s hard to understand
it’s drama? Depression? Anxiety? Bullshit?
It’s only I staring at mirror and asking “why”…
But you don’t want know about it
it’s about me, my mistakes, my sins, my shits
I tried to change, to fit
there is no hole where I can be buried
yeah, fire, like an old viking, send me to a boat in flames
so, it’s time to reclaim my place
limbo, heaven, hell
I don’t give a fuck about name
I just want to feel good, stay well
but it’s hard how do this when my enemy is within me
fuck me up and give me nails
I will do what I need to do with myself

 

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